Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Inferno

A group of denizens (broadly speaking) of the Golden City decide that actually, Hell is hell, and they'd like to get out. But the lower realms weren't designed to be left easily...

The Golden City

The hell of aesthetics. The domain of beauty above all - above comfort, above justice, above compassion, above life. Its pristine boulevards are lined with endless salons, museums, gardens and galleries, and behind them the garrets of those who slave for endless days and nights to keep them clean and beautiful. Its lords and ladies in their mansions sponsor great artists to buttress their reputations, and great critics to destroy those of their opponents. Here the fall of an artist into madness and atrocity in search of inspiration is not only an expected part of the creative process - it is itself a beautiful and desired element of the tragedy of her life.

Bavaria Megaragusa's travel guide suggests the following distinctive sights:

• Caged singers.
• Animation sweatshops.
• Public criticism session - very exciting!
• Human sculpture.
• Gladiatorial dance.

Besides the usual precations for infernal travel, Bavaria Megaragusa suggests:

• Having a spare set of expensive clothes.
• Buying an up-to-date style guide immediately on arrival. It'll cost, and won't actually impress anyone, but it will keep the critical police off your back for short stays.
• If caught off guard by a critic or socialite, deflect with a confident reference to something obscure, or preferably made-up entirely. It'll buy you time to get away while they're on the defensive.

The Wasteland

A Hell adjacent to the Golden City. A blasted desert of bone dust pockmarked with the wreckage of civilisations. Domain of roving marauder bands who sometimes ride out on their mad vehicles to attempt to pillage the City. The greatest of the marauders is known as 'the Calamity'.

Mechanics

Hell isn't quite like IRL.

• Coincidentality varies and usually depends on following the rules of the hell in question. For example, in the Golden City, creating ugly things is vulgar.
• Pattern spheres work on materialised spirits according to their nature, but Spirit is more permanent.

Hikers

Who are you, how did you get here, and why do you want to leave?